Don’t wear your lanyard or Class of 2016 shirts. It’s good to have pride in your school, but hold off on the shirt for at least another year.

Don’t travel to events or parties in large packs. Unless you want to get yelled at from cars, avoid it at all costs.

Don’t hook up with your resident adviser or someone on your floor. A year is a long time, and you are about to redefine awkward for you and your floor-mates.

Don’t eat out every night. You will be two weeks in and every cent of your college savings will be gone. Your parents got you that meal plan for a reason.

Don’t wear heels to a party that’s far away in the winter. Carry them at your side while you trod along in your practical boots. Seriously.

Don’t attempt real work on the first floor of E.S. Bird Library. Either move up a few floors or prepare to be socialbutterflied by the occupants of Club Bird.

Don’t feel flattered when you’re called “pretty lady” walking down Marshall Street. He says that to everyone. Calm down.

Don’t get stuck at a party on South Campus after 3 a.m. That bus isn’t coming back anytime soon.

Don’t use an out-of-state ID at Chuck’s. It’ll still be there when you’re older. We promise.

Don’t pretend you know where a building is when you actually don’t. It’s better to ask directions than be hopelessly lost.

Don’t walk up and down Euclid asking where the parties are. Odds are no one will tell you.

Don’t have sex with your significant other while your roommate is home. It’s always preferable to give someone a 15-minute sexile than making him or her unwilling first-row spectators.

Don’t go out too early. You may be ready to party at 9 p.m., but the action doesn’t start until at least 11 p.m. Wandering the street hours too early screams “freshman.”

Don’t send mass texts asking where the party’s at. This may be OK once or twice, but you’ll annoy your friends if you never return the favor. No one likes a clinger.

Don’t overload your Fridays with tough classes. Let’s face it, Thirsty Thursdays are the best night of the week. Don’t give yourself a difficult Friday schedule you won’t be able to handle.

Don’t get on your RA’s bad side. Even if he or she is a total fun-sucker, he or she is there for a reason. Don’t make enemies right off the bat or you’ll regret it later.

– Compiled by The Daily Orange Feature Staff, pulp@dailyorange.com

Published on August 21, 2012 at 11:08 pm