Jim Boeheim took a couple of steps onto the court and got his son’s attention.

“If you don’t f*cking shoot,” he told Buddy during a game in December, “I’m taking you out.”

Following the end of Buddy’s first season, there’s little indication he’s the son of a Hall of Fame coach. Few signals that he’s the coach’s son who fulfilled a lifelong dream of playing for his dad. Little special treatment: Buddy rode the bench the first half of the season, until he began hitting shots and earning more minutes.

Boeheim’s comment to Buddy earlier this season represented a rare moment in which he showed he’s as demanding of his son as he is other players. Buddy and multiple Syracuse (20-13, 10-8 Atlantic Coast) teammates understand the rarity of a father-son duo at a high-major Division I basketball program, yet they said there’s little distinction between Buddy and the other players. Boeheim, players said, coaches Buddy the same way he coaches them. He’s not noticeably harder, nor is he more patient for Buddy. 

Alexandra Moreo | Senior Staff Photographer

This father-son dynamic represents an inversion of the conventional distribution of power between a coach — a Hall of Famer, no less — and someone who plays for one. It doesn’t always work out at younger levels, said Larry Lauer, a sports psychologist. They also say there’s an added pressure associated with playing for a parent, especially a highly successful one. There’s an underlying pressure for being “an extension of your father,” Lauer said.

***

Buddy knew what he would be getting himself into if he were to choose Syracuse. Long before he played his first game for his father, the SU coaching staff also was aware of the situation and the type of challenges it would present. He and his close friend, walk-on Brendan Paul, said they knew what the father-son dynamic would entail, including the “Daddy’s Boy!” chants he faces at road games.

As Buddy started getting college attention, programs other than Syracuse caught on. Mark Few, head coach of No. 1 seed Gonzaga, called Buddy and offered him a scholarship after he put on a show in an AAU game. Georgetown’s Patrick Ewing told Buddy’s father he had a spot on the team.

After a strong showing at Peach Jam, an elite summer tournament, the Syracuse coaching staff of Adrian Autry, Allen Griffin and Gerry McNamara met with Boeheim in his office. Division I coaches had been watching Buddy, seeing his progression and grew interested in recruiting him. So had SU.

“Jim got to the point where coaches were coming to all of Buddy’s games,” Juli said. “He felt guilty about that. Then all of the coaches came in and sat down in Jim’s office. They told him, ‘We want to offer Buddy. He’s good enough.’ That meant a lot to Jim. They didn’t do that because it’s what Jim wanted to hear. They told him he’s proven he can be here.”

One day in the summer of 2017, Juli was chatting with Buddy in their kitchen. She decided to tell him.

“I told him, ‘The coaches want to offer you a scholarship,’” Juli recalled. “I wanted Buddy to know that this happened not because of dad.”

Buddy didn’t say anything. He quietly took it in.

“What do you think about that, bud?” Juli remembered she asked.

“You know I’ve always wanted to play at Syracuse for dad,” he said.

“It’s a big step, big undertaking,” Juli said.

“He’s like, ‘I know, I know all that,’” Juli recalled. “It wasn’t anything crazy, he was just quietly listening. I know it meant a lot to him. It’s what he always wanted.”

***

Alexandra Moreo | Senior Staff Photographer

Last fall, Buddy arrived at Syracuse as one of the premier shooters in his class, according to McNamara. He compared Buddy’s form to Klay Thompson. Buddy and junior Elijah Hughes would bolster a team that otherwise hadn’t been reliant on 3-point shooting. But Buddy connected on just two of his first 18 3-pointers over his first five games, and he struggled to impact the game in any other way.

Through his cold spell in conference play, Boeheim urged him to be patient and trust his shot, Juli said. “Be patient,” he told Buddy. “It’ll come. Just keep shooting.”

“At the beginning of the season, it was kind of a question about whether he could here,” Paul said. “I even questioned it myself sometimes. I’d be like, ‘Is he pressing these players to give Buddy the ball because it’s his son?’ He was playing, I’m not going to lie, terribly.”

Sometime after another 0-for shooting performance, Paul saw enough. Paul’s father, Curt, had bought a mindfulness book for Buddy before the season, but he hadn’t opened it. Now, Paul implored him that it was the time to read it. Buddy downloaded Headspace, a meditation app, to his iPhone. He meditates on the bus to games, when he arrives at the venue and during halftime. Sometimes, during timeouts and free-throws, he focuses on the breath to be present.

“I realized it was really calming me down for the game,” Buddy said.

Naturally, as Buddy and Paul predicted, he’d be compared against his father. If he wasn’t playing well, people would think he’d be on the floor only because his dad made the lineups. Buddy and the coaches knew the best way for him to earn validation would be to perform. Getting hot in conference play — and last week at the ACC tournament — confirmed he had earned playing time not because of his last name, but because of his ability.

“He’s another coach for me,” Buddy said of his father. “He’s going to get on me. I want him to so I can learn from him. It hasn’t been an overwhelming experience. Playing for my dad, I try not to let anything outside the program get to me. If anything, it should make you want to work harder than ever, because you’re playing for your dad. You want to win for him. It’s special.”

“It definitely adds pressure playing for him,” Buddy added, “but if you block it out, it’s just another game.”

Buddy and Paul, who are roommates, met after each game to break down three aspects he thrived in and one thing he could have done better. He limited his social media usage. Meditation and self-reflection proved to be the formula to get Buddy out of his slump. That, in turn, helped him earn the trust of teammates and respect of fans that he could compete in the ACC, he said.

Alexandra Moreo | Senior Staff Photographer

Boeheim doesn’t usually bring up his son to the team. Before the season, he didn’t meet with players about what the father-son dynamic would be like. Yet, before a recent practice, Boeheim met with the team to chat about the second Duke game of the season, an SU loss in the Carrier Dome. He told players Buddy was a below-average defender, and that he’s aware of his weaknesses.

“When you put Buddy in, we want him to get shots,” Paul recalled Boeheim saying. “I know he’s my son, but I don’t care. I would say the same thing about someone else if they were in the exact same position as him, the same as my son.”

Otherwise, Boeheim rarely singles out Buddy. He speaks of him in postgame press conferences and interviews as if he’s another player, usually referring to him as “Buddy.” Senior point guard Frank Howard said last month that he hadn’t once heard “dad” or “son” on the court. Players said if there weren’t last names on the back of SU jerseys, it’d be difficult to discern Buddy as the coach’s son.

Several weeks ago, Juli chatted with her son. Both knew the opening weeks, even months, hadn’t gone as well as they’d wish. But that was in the rearview. Boeheim said it’s “too hard” to coach his son, but Buddy had begun to define his role as a college freshman for SU — spark plug off the bench who can stretch the floor — while playing under his father.

“How is it, bud?” Juli asked him that day. “Is it as amazing as you thought’d it be?”

“Mom,” Buddy said, and looked up at her. “It really is.”

Published on March 22, 2019 at 2:44 pm

Contact Matthew: mguti100@syr.edu | @MatthewGut21